7:00 AM - Our intended departure time
9:02 AM - We are still at home. Because Tim is incapable of waking up or following directions, Mom of letting go, and me of being patient
9:05 AM - We are now moving toward the car. Yay!
9:06 AM - Dad is commiting a rite of passage/act of fatherhood/bonding thing by giving me a jacket. A Polo Jacket. And Yes I am going to make fun of this.
9:07 AM - Tim is doing Hydralics
Tim: FRONT! BACK! SIDE TO SIDE!
9:10 AM - The Bonding Continues. Dad is going to show me how to wear The Polo Jacket. Because it's not just any jacket. It's a Polo Jacket.
9:12 AM - Tim enters the car.
Michael: Do you have anything to say, Tim?
Tim: I'm gonna set my watch so that at 11:00 AM I am going to yell "I gon' blast you in your internal organs!"
Michael: Okay...Good!
9:14 AM -
DAMN DOG! IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR ME I AM GOING TO TOSS YO' ASS INTO THE LAKE
9:17 AM - We Depart...
9:18 AM - Mom decided to give Tim control of the Dog, due to the fact that she doesn't want dog hair on her. Well that means I have to live "The Eight Minutes From Hell"
9:24 AM - We Made It. Ace Kennels. "This is my favorite part of the trip" Mom declares Dad doesn't comment
9:30 AM -
Click...Ahhhhh
9:35 AM - Panera Bread. mmmmm...bagels
9:38 AM - Dad, brilliant mind that he is, left all of his money in his Golf Bag and that, coupled with the fact that he absolutely
must stop by the office means that our ETA is bumped back to around 12:30 PM Chicago Time.
10:03 AM - We're Home...Again. Punch and Judy go inside to get the money. More as events develop.
10:06 AM - It's a wonderful fall day. The air is crisp, the sky blue, the leaves changing, and Dad, still looking for his wallet.
10:07 AM - We're leaving again. Hee! Leaving, Part Two: Electric Boogaloo
NAPPING OCCURS...
10:53 AM - "Don't get mad at me, It's not like none of you have never made mistakes" Yeah, well, we haven't made several the day we're supposed to go on a trip. In fact it has pretty much been your fault because you screwed around for TWO FREAKING HOURS. In case you haven't yet realized we are still in Fishers. ETA at the Sheraton 2:35 PM, Chicago Time. Thanks in large part to dad who can't seem to do anything right. Ever. At all.
11:00 AM - We depart for the third time today. I resist the urge to ask Dad "Hey are you sure you have everything you need. Because we can
always go
back..." Heh. Oh and I am going to transcribe this gem of dialogue verbatim for you.
Dad: I know you're mad, but come look at this. This is cool.
Michael: Is it the
SEARS TOWER?
11:08 AM - We get on the beltway. After two hours, three false starts, and at least one meltdown from the Mom
11:16 AM - Tim can't find Pokèmon. Mom roars at me. Literally.
11:17 AM - We just passed a car from Tennesee. Seven old people were packed into a Caravan, with the driver on a cell phone, eating a sandwich and smoking a cigarette. AT THE SAME TIME.
11:20 AM - We are on 65, people. Miles to go before we sleep, people.
11:22 AM - I just had a really scary thought. What if this happens at Christmas. I mean there are FLIGHTS on that trip. Mom & Dad really can't be trusted with timetables...
MORE NAPPING ENSUES
11:43 AM - We are near Frankfurt and almost halfway.
